Foreward

This is the forward to my new book, Magick: Back to the Basics, Living with the Elements

This book started as a series of lectures for my students. That is where I laid the seeds, and that is where they started to grow, and as it began to produce fruit, I began to think think back on what made me start magick in the first place. It was a slow evolution but I can trace it back to a central moment.
 I was in 8th grade. This was a turbulent time in my life, we had just moved back to Missouri from Texas and my mother was in the middle of a nervous breakdown. The church we had attended down south had left our loving family in ruins. My mother scared of her own shadow, afraid of the things she now felt haunted her and the damnation she had let into her life. My father had begun to drink again, and although not confirmed we were all sure he was cheating on her at this time, and I so disgusted with the church our family had been a part of and the damage that "God" had allow to befall us. I had lost my faith in everything. Lost my faith in a mother and father who could protect our family. Lost my faith in god and religion, Lost my faith in society, and lost my faith in my self.
This period of time after moving back home I was having trouble making friends, since I came back mid semester. Every day was  a dull dream like existence. I was just living because I knew no other way to exist. I know this sounds overly bleak, but this is one of the darkness times of my life. I have had a couple and this one set the precedent for magick to help me heal in each of my times of need.
During this time, I would spend my days staring out of windows. I didn't even day dream. I just stared.
With maybe 2 months left till summer vacation started our bus driver quit, so our new driver began taking a new route. I noticed in this particular empty field a very old woman alone in the field. She was always facing the east and seemed to be in a state of deep meditation. The other kids started making fun of her, but i was intrigued. After about a week of watching her, I decided get off at a different stop than I normally would. It left me only a few blocks from the field, and I was hoping I could find the woman.
I approached the field and after about an hour I saw her sitting outside on a patio of an old farmhouse. I slowly approached her. She smiled at me and had a very warm smile. She asked me if I was lost and I told her no. I was nervous to ask her what she was doing outside everyday. I thought i was crazy to be that curious, my parents raised me not to be that noisy into other peoples business and the raised me never to talk to strangers. After a brief struggle to collect my words, I told her why I sought her out. She closed her eyes for a moment and I thought maybe she was going to ask me to leave, but instead she explained what she was doing, and then offered me tea.
For the remaining weeks of the school year, I would go to her house, drink tea and she would talk and I would listen, and as I listened, I began to heal. She explained Philosophy's to me, explained what I would later come to understand as the Qabalah to me, she explained and taught me the 4 adoration's to the sun to me. That was the
what she was doing every morning when I saw her. She taught me the LBRP and several other things, but the most important thing she taught me to believe in my self and taught me the only divinity that matters is the spark inside of me that no one can taint or take away. No matter what other divinity I should come to believe in no matter what I learn or do from that moment on. She taught me to remember I am divine.
In a way I was lucky of the state my home was in no one seemed to notice when I came home 3 hours late each day, but alas the last time of school came and It would be the last day I would be able to see her regularly. She during tea had some special for me. On the table was a copy of a book. I have many copies of now. She told me It was something special, something that would stay with me for the rest of my life. It was the Book Of The Law.

I must of read it everyday the first week she gave it too me. If she would of gave it too any other child my age, I doubt they could have read it or understood it, but I started reading at a very early age and started reading Stephen King in first grade and HP Lovecraft in 2nd. I adored the book, but as life is Nothing lasts forever my parents found it in my hiding spot and through it out and gave me a nasty punishing. I saw her a few more time before the end, but she didn't live much longer after that.

My first teachers name was Amelia, nothing special or exotic, just Amelia. She was 89 years old and I adored her, and continue to adore her to this day. She taught me about my self, and about the world.